*sigh*

Mobiles are fucking hard to make. Disgruntled am I.

So, I am going to try to make a better effort to start writing on this thing again. In a way, this l'il blog here has allowed me to vent out all sorts of things, allowing me to speak freely and without any sense of pressure. I miss that.

So, I don't really have much to report. I am working on some projects, trying to get my life sorted out. Sometimes it seems that you forget that you have one, and even though being present is a good thing, perhaps it isn't always because you forget where you were going because you were busy looking at the flowers, and lo... you've missed your bus.

Don't get me wrong. I think it's imperative to sit and take moments, moments, moments. But I also think that it isn't good to lose sight of where it is that you are going. Like I said, you'll miss your bus. And that? Sucks ass. Especially if the next one doesn't come for a few minutes, hours, days, months... years.

Interesting things have been unfolding in the last little while. I've been in contact with people from the past. Past sometimes evolves into the present to present us with the future. My future is becoming increasingly uncertain, but then whoever says that theirs is certain doesn't really know what they are talking about do they.

I'd have to say that lately I've been quite depressed. Perhaps I am wrong. Maybe this is just life? I often wonder where people are going, what they are thinking. I often wonder if they are feeling the same way that I do. I always find it amazing how I know that I am not the only one, but am always surprised when I meet a person who says "Oh, I totally know what you mean. I feel that way all the time."

I had an interesting experience today. I was listening to the Velvet Underground while I was getting ready for work, and I had this sudden realization of what it felt like to be moved by it. I can't really describe it further than that, but just that I had some kind of connection to the person who introduced me to it. A moment where I transcended myself and suddenly I felt not myself, but fully myself. This feeling made me think twice what a personality is, what thought is, what it means to be me, as I describe it or how I am described. I felt.

Anyways, I am suffering from a small bout of insomnia, although it is only 11:30.
Night.