...
Really? Huh. Imagine that.
Things I've said (to myself and others) over the last days:
"Why is your prized posession a leather chair? What the hell is wrong with you? What about your life, or your mind? Are these not your prized posessions?"
"Your mental health is not a game of Jenga. You should not be taking blocks from the middle and putting them on the top, a block from the side and putting it on top - because you are going to topple over, eventually."
"It's hard to want to participate. It's like the drugs have stopped working! This feeling I have, it's the same I had a few years ago. It was scary then, because I didn't know what it meant, and it hurt so much. Now, it hurts, but I know why. I can deal with it better now. Because I can see it for what it is."
"I worry about all my friends safety and health, and worry that something will happen to them that will make them no more, so much to the point it causes me pain. And I realize it's ultimately because I am scared to be left alone."
"In this moment, I am happy. And that is all that really matters, to me."
4 comments:
Those are a mishmash of feelings all right. I think this means that we need to hang out! My turn to make your brain better!!!
Saturday? You, me, Dave and a bucket of fried chicken? Or steak and wine?
I am lazy and so anonymous I be.
G
I hate when I feel that way.
I don't know that I'm afaid to be alone, but I worry. A lot. And I hate it.
Yeah, I've got issues. Being left alone because of something that is out of my control is a big one for me. But figuring it out, and actually admitting it out loud (the audiophile was so proud of me) is helping.
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