Ass Kicking The Blues.

Still feeling blue today. Blue, blue, blue.

It's really quite ridiculous however, I mean I don't think I really have anything to be blue about. Sure, the Audiophile's gone out of town for a few days, but it's not like he hasn't done that before. I suppose it really is due to the fact I need to just get out of town myself. Poor 'Phile, he watched me breakdown practically when we had breakfast yesterday morning, and then I felt like a shit and didn't want him to think I was trying to make him feel bad about going to see his family.

Or maybe I feel blue because I suffer from total job dissatisfaction. Indeed I believe this is the major cause of blueness. I HATE my job. I hate it. I can't stand selling my time for such a mundane task. And certainly it isn't something I have just settled for and bitch about. I have tried escaping the monotony of this Uber Hellish Boring Job. But you try and explain to someone who is interviewing you why you really don't have a whole lot of work experience, especially between 2001 - 2005. That's 4 years. 4 years where I was out of the job force because I was too sick to work. And I can tell you honesty won't get you anywhere. They all think you had the plague or something, and that you might relapse.

So, I suck it up. I have the good fortune of having a second job, one that I can use to my advantage in trying to find my career, I think, for the rest (!) of my life. Or at least for a few years. And the UHB Job compensates well given the tasks at hand. I can't really complain in that department. Or can I? To what level of complete dissatisfaction are you supposed to endure before you can look and say 'SCREW THE PAY, it isn't WORTH IT!'

Or, maybe I am blue because I feel like I should be doing 'biological' things. Yes folks. Biological. Meaning? Starts with a 'B' and rhymes with 'RABIES'. Incidently I chose that word because I fear the 'B' word about as much as I do the 'R' word. If it became an issue that is. I don't actively fear either the 'B' or the 'R' in general, only in direct relation to moi. Yes, those 'rabies' are lovely and nice, but I am not interesting in hosting 'rabies'. But I am fully aware of this intense biological need to produce 'rabies'. And having the capability to rationalize a BIOLOGICAL reaction, kind of freaks me out a bit. I mean I think about it. That folks, if you know me, is fucked up.

Just for the record, I have no intentions of producing 'rabies' of any sort, at least not for a while. So, I think I am going to get a dog. But you know what that means?

I would have to move. God dammit! But, as much as I love my apartment, I am wanting to move to a house, which is absurd considering how much hell I went though moving to my new apartment. But, in a year I will move to a house. Some how. And then, if I still feel the need, I will get a dog. He'd (or she'd) have a yard. I would NEVER get a dog and live in an apartment.

So, I am having a lot to consider here. A new job, so that I can get into a house where I could contemplate hosting 'rabies', but will get a dog instead who will keep me company while The 'Phile is away visiting family. Sounds nice doesn't it.

Oh, but I must say. These are some of the things that keep me going in this crazy world. Like Music, and movies and books and The Audiophile's sense of style. And stuff like this. Or this. Or this. Oh and cripes! YO LA TENGO HAS A NEW ALBUM COMING OUT on SEPETMBER 12th TITLED:

Yo La Tengo Are Not Afraid Of You And They Will Kick You In The Ass.
Now That. Makes. My. Day.